It's raining...

well, not really, but you know that expression "when it rains, it pours" today I realized I had taken about us much sadness as I could for one week and it just seems to keep on raining.

after days of holding it together and being ok with this or that prayer request or concern or situation, tonight I just feel like crying. My grandmother...is very likely losing a battle with cancer. She has been sick for about a year, but was only diagnosed a few months ago. She wants to get better, but her body is weak and her mind is growing weaker. She is thin, so thin and so quiet. She is not the person of strength that she has always been. She is frail rather than focused. She is having trouble talking rather than asserting her opinions. She is slipping away in front of us and it is not easy.

meanwhile....one of my best friends is struggling with a very sick little boy who has had a high fever for close to a weak with an unknown cause.... another friend gave birth early, and at home, with virtually no warning and her little one is in the NICU at the hospital... and another friend called me yesterday to tell catch me up on the last year of her life, during which time she has battled with Hodgkin's disease and, praise the Lord -- is in remission... and today, the last straw was finding out that my son's 25-year-old, pregnant day school teacher was just informed that she has cancer.

in the midst of this week, Thom came home one day only to inform me that 10% of Thomas Nelson had been let go that day, and while we thanked God that Thom was not among that 10 percent, the day was hard for everyone as it is difficult to feel for so many people experiencing such shocking news all at once.

so, although I know the adage that when it rains it pours, I'm really wishing for an umbrella or at least an awning under which to shield myself for a while.